Losing up and Down? ????????‍♂️????

So, im testing some things with futures contracts because it seems like if I choose long.. it goes down.

If i choose short, it goes up.

Due to this, i decided to f*** with the markets head. I bought two contracts long of one asset, then 2 contracts short on two other assets who were following the 1st asset identically.

And now im literally negative profit on all 4 contracts. ????????‍♂️

How in the &%*# are both of my shorts going up but my 2 longs are going down when they were all doing the same thing minutes before ????????

Not a serious question though, Just one of those verbal " Bro howwww" moments ???? stuff is weak though thats for sure.