My shark tank pitch idea: a hardware wallet that can be safely stored up your butt

Hear me out before passing judgement. I actually think this has legs.

It's not a wallet for everyone, I'll admit, but it can be used by anyone in a pinch. For the absolute safety conscious among us what better place to keep it, then a natural hiddy hole.

The idea is that if you realise you're getting robbed and have time, you'll put what's most precious up where the sun don't shine. Who think to or how would they search the prison pocket afterall.

Why for all that is innocent in this world would you do that you ask?

Well if they hold you up and find that hardware wallet they'll work you over big time until you give up the keys and make you transfer the digital gold away.

That doesn't happen!

Oh but it does, somewhat regularly.

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/02/18/technology/virtual-currency-extortion.html

I'm sold, but why are you sharing this obviously million dollar idea wise one?

Well I need a catchy name, and what better place to seek ideas from the beautiful SOB's on the best crypto but also highest commenting subreddit?

So far I got:

Colon Crypt

Sphincter Safe

So have a laugh and see what comes out, no pressure.